How Well Do You Let Go and Move On?

This is part 2 of my “Letting Go” series. If you missed Part 1 “When your buttons get pushed how well you you manage?” you can find it here

Whether you’re letting go of a cherished idea or person or a vision of how life was supposed to be, it can feel excruciating to leave something or someone behind. It can feel as though you’re losing a part of yourself.

Sometimes you might even feel attached to your anger and resentment. But letting go can be an empowering act, because it pushes you to develop important resources like courage, compassion, forgiveness and love.

Answer the following true/false questions to discover how well you release what’s no longer viable:

Set 1

1. I have a hard time letting go of grudges. When someone does me wrong, they are permanently on my “bad” list.

2. I somehow feel it’s “noble” to never give up, and this has caused me to stay in unhealthy relationships or situations.

3. When an intimate relationship ends, it can take me years to get over it.

4. I spend a lot of time living in the past—sometimes reliving old glory days, sometimes replaying what I wish I’d done differently.

5. When I make a mistake, I can’t stop dwelling on it and kicking myself.

6. I feel paralyzed by my fear of the unknown. I can’t let go of what I have when I don’t know what will replace it.

Set 2

1. When negative emotions arise, I allow myself to fully experience all my feelings, and I quickly find myself in a better emotional state.

2. Leaving behind a situation that isn’t working for me is the most self-caring thing I can do.

3. Finding a way to forgive someone—and sometimes myself—allows me to release anger and blame.

4. When I’m in conflict with someone, sharing my feelings allows me to feel heard, release my negative feelings and return to a place of peace and connection.

5. Although keeping the status quo may feel safer, I am committed to making choices that help me get out of my comfort zone and grow.

6. When dealing with the grieving process around the death of a loved one or the end of a relationship, ultimately finding a way to accept what IS, even though still sad, brings me greater peace.

How did you do?  This isn’t to judge yourself, only to observe so you can put words to your feelings, validate those emotions and move on. If you answered true to any in Set 1 and could use some support I’d love to have you join my Group Call on the topic of Forgiveness on April 19th @ 1pm MT. Sometimes finding peace is simply a matter of be willing to forgive ourselves and others.

Author’s content used under license, © Claire Communications

When Your Buttons Get Pushed, How Well Do You Manage?

QUIZ:
When Your Buttons Get Pushed, How Well Do You Manage?

When you have an automatic, negative response to something, this often indicates a hypersensitivity that’s referred to as “getting your buttons pushed.” Usually these sensitivities have developed due to hurtful childhood experiences, such as repeatedly being criticized, rejected or feeling controlled.
image

For example, if your parents were very controlling, when someone tells you to do something you may resist—often subconsciously. Sometimes these sensitivities stem from generational fears we’ve inherited.

Answer the following two sets of questions, true or false, to discover how well you manage when you feel like your buttons are being pushed.

Set 1

1. When my buttons get pushed, I tend to shut down and withdraw.

2. When someone hurts me—even when I know it was unintentional—I blame myself for the situation.

3. When I feel offended by something someone said or did I let them know, often by lashing out.

4. I hate it when someone tells me I’m “too sensitive.”

5. When someone says or does something that triggers the feelings connected to an old emotional pain, it takes me a long time to let go of it and feel centered again. I often carry a resentment.

6. Sometimes I have no idea why I do what I do—I just can’t control myself.

7. Once someone pushes my buttons, that’s it—my wall goes up and stays up. I feel like a powerless little kid.

Set 2

1. When old feelings are triggered by something in the present, I take a deep breath, acknowledge that old feelings have been activated, get myself to a safe and comfortable environment and seek the support I need.

2. Rather than feeling victimized and blaming someone for pushing my buttons, I, again, take a deep breath, and then take an honest look at myself to see what I can learn from the situation.

3. I’ve worked to uncover old, painful issues so that I can release what was triggered and not feel at the mercy of my emotional response.

4. When I feel triggered, I understand that it usually has nothing to do with the person who pushed my buttons.

5. I’m familiar with my most common “buttons”; I recognize them more quickly now and am less reactive.

6. When my buttons do get pushed now, I am able to see the unresolved issues needing my attention.

7. I feel like an empowered adult when I can courageously look at my emotional triggers and work through them.

If you answered TRUE to any in Set 1, you probably recognize there are some things you could let go of to help you be more congruent with your best self.

If you answered TRUE more often in Set 1 and FALSE more often in Set 2 I’d love to help you experience life without dragging those triggers around with you any longer.

If you answered FALSE more often in Set 1 and TRUE more often in Set 2, yay you! You’ve obviously done the work to recognize your unresolved issues and are working through them. SimplyHealed is truly the fastest, most thorough, and most graceful way I know to do that.

See, it’s not about who’s pushing your buttons and why.
The questions I look at are:

  • Where did those buttons come from?
  • Why are you carrying them?
  • And most importantly, are you now willing to let them go?

Yes, it is possible to be free of old, buried (and sometimes not-so-buried) negative emotions that cause you to “take” offense even when none is given.

I absolutely love what I do because every day I get the privilege of helping people release the heaviness that’s come from their life situations so they can live a life they are happy living!

If there are areas in your life where you wish you were stronger and more confident, or if you know you have triggers you’d like to release so you can live the life you were born to, here are some options of how I can help:

Stay tuned next month for Part Two of this Quiz and learn more about letting go and moving on to a more positive life that you love!

Author’s content used under license, © 2010 Claire Communications

Let me be honest…SimplyHealed is my baby.

Let me be honest…SimplyHealed is my baby. I’ve nurtured her and grown her for many years. This work has changed my life and thousands of student’s lives as well (not to mention their families and clients).

I’m usually not this bold to speak of my life’s work like this, but this email seems to be writing itself…

Because…do you feel it? Now is the time, our world needs light-workers. We need women and men of integrity who have tools that can cut the tethers of limiting beliefs, that can clean up negative emotions from the past (our own and our ancestors), that can help people be the best version of themselves.

After all, isn’t that what we are all doing? Trying to become the best version of ourselves?

SimplyHealed doesn’t just bring about transformation, it requires it. But don’t let that scare you. It happens in a subtle, elegant way, by empowering you, at your own pace, from the inside out.

I know this because for years I’ve had students return for SimplyHealed Refresher courses after they’ve been using the SimplyHealed method for awhile and. well, they are different. More positive and confident in their actions, their speech, their intentions…they often even look different!

Why am I telling you all this today?

Because my next SimplyHealed Certification Track is coming up this spring.(How appropriate, the time of blooming!)

April 4th – 7th, 2017
in sunny St George, UT

If you are new to my tribe, let me explain what SimplyHealed is:

It’s an Energy Healing method that is simple, graceful, thorough, effective. Tried and proven over many years by many people.

Simply put, SimplyHealed is a way to be happy. To feel light, unburdened, competent, capable.

Logistics:

4-days LIVE in classroom with me and new like-minded friends

PLUS 6 months online:

  • Group Training/Coaching Calls
  • Business Training (how to get started as a practitioner)
  • Personal Healing Sessions (to optimize your mindset)
  • Private Forum (connect with seasoned practitioners & archives of info!)

I only open the doors to a special group of students in my cerTrac twice a year. I’d love you to join this group and in 6 months be living your truest life.

I want you to come for YOU, but I also want you to come for ALL the family members and clients you will be able to help. For the inspiring ripple effect you will create in our world.

How would that enhance your life?

As I mentioned before, attending a SimplyHealed course doesn’t just give you information, it brings transformation. Please don’t take only my word for it, learn more and check out the video testimonials from students here.

Now is the time, our world needs you to be your best self, and by doing so your light will help others rise.

Learn more, get your questions answered, and see more videos here: http://simplyhealed.com/certify/

OR, if you already know this is right for you, click here to register now.

(2-pay option ends March 3rd)

I would love to have you in this new cerTrac group beginning in April, and in 6 months from now you could have a life and a healing practice that you love!

Much love,

image

Top 10 Tips for Great Idea Generation

Great ideas can mean the difference between mediocrity and huge success, between boredom and passion. Whether you want to write an e-book, plan a family trip, or even landscape your yard, consider the following tips:

1. Pay attention. Ideas come when we least expect them so awareness is often the first step. Give your mind (and imagination) space to explore the world around you.

2. Stimulate creativity. What helps take your mind in different directions? A day off? Chasing your 2-year-old? Dancing? A mastermind group?

3. Examine your beliefs. What thoughts keep you stuck in the same old same-old? Which ones sabotage your efforts or keep your ideas small?

4. Play. Play with words. Play with concepts and characters. Play both inside and outside the box.

5. Identify the “juice.” What is it you LOVE to do? See if you can incorporate that—or the energy of it—into your ideas.

6. Get your pen moving. This writers’ trick works in all kinds of scenarios to generate great ideas. Just start writing.

7. Notice what’s not working. The heart of a problem is rich with possibility for creative solutions.

8. Ask. Solicit input from people in your field of interest. Or, if you’re spiritually inclined, ask for guidance through prayer, meditation, or your inner wisdom.

9. Be open. Ideas can come from anywhere. Your teenager may articulate just the thing that will work for your needs.

10. Keep track. Great ideas are often born while driving or running or sitting at the beach. Keep your phone recorder or notebook always handy to capture them.

Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire Communications

Vibe Raising 101

Over the years in my work as a teacher of Energy Healing, one of the questions I get asked a lot is…”how can I keep my vibration high and maintain it even on tough days?”

Wouldn’t it be great if there was a magic formula to keep our personal vibration strong and positive at all times?

Well, it’s not about magic formulas, or an ancient secret or new age discovery that will teach us how to make that happen, but it is about remembering what you already intuitively know to do.

Truth is, anything that makes you feel joyful and alive is a vibe-raiser.

Here are 6 easy actions that you can put into action right now that will help raise and strengthen your vibration:

As I always say, our energy speaks louder than our words, and there are simple things that we can do to keep our energy vibrant.

1. Remember that energy follows thought. In any situation, you can use positive affirmations to boost your energy field.

2. Own your power! Reminding yourself that your personal energy field is vivid and powerful will naturally boost your vibration.

3. Picture yourself surrounded by a field of strong and vibrant light, and even better, see that light originating within you. This, by way, is my favorite way to ‘shield’ myself. Watch my short video about it here.

4. Look for the good in others. Don’t allow negative energy to overtake you through gossiping or complaining. By speaking only well of others, you stay connected to the “best version of you” which feels happy, increases self-confidence, and of course strengthens your vibration.

5. Acknowledge your own good qualities. Don’t dwell on what you believe are your negative attributes. When faced with a challenge, an unfamiliar situation or a stressful social occasion, don’t buy into the false beliefs that you are awkward, or that you have nothing to offer conversationally, or that you are in any way less than others. We all have light sides and shadow sides, it’s part of being human. Self-pity is heavy energy, so dismiss those negative thoughts by flipping them to something you like about yourself.

And number six, is my personal favorite. It is an age-old, tried and proven, definitely-works remedy for a waning personal vibration. Are you ready…. Drum roll please…

6. Be kinder than you need to be.

Yep, that’s it! Kindness through service to others literally raises your energetic vibration!

Of course, you know that, because you’ve experienced how warm and rewarding it feels to reach out with kind service to another. Since what you send out is what you get back, it makes sense that if you seek for happiness, helping someone else experience happiness will automatically bring it your way as well.

When we help our fellowmen, not only do our deeds assist them, but we put our own problems in a fresher perspective. It’s a win-win situation!

My December List

There are so many extra “to dos” during December, and I realize sometimes a regular routine can get lost in the flurry, at least mine can!

So here’s my personal simple reminder list of eleven self-care BASICS to keep me balanced anytime I’m going through an extra busy time. Holiday time is a really good time to make sure none of these slip through the cracks!

I hope my list helps you too:

  • Eat a minimum of one raw fruit and one raw vegetable each day
  • Drink plenty of water (with extra treats you may need more than you think)
  • Get enough sleep -listen to your body when it needs rest
  • Stick to your exercise routine, even if time-wise you need to shorten it some days
  • Be still for at least 5 min each day -breathe deeply to connect your body, mind, and spirit
  • Don’t neglect writing daily in your gratitude journal, it only takes a minute and yields great rewards
  • Practice staying in the moment- wherever you are, tell yourself “Be here now” and whether you are in traffic, or standing in a long check out line, or anywhere else, find the beauty in it
  • See the humor in situations and share the laughter with others (this always lightens me up!)
  • Take time for TEA. I’m referring to MiracleTea® – for me it helps with brain fog, better sleep, cleans up toxins if I sneak in a soda pop!
  • Each day do at least one act of service for someone else (even small things count!)
  • Do Less Better – this has been my mantra for a few months and has helped me tremendously! I’ll write an article about how it’s helped me and can help you too, in an upcoming newsletter.

The Call to Create

creative

The sound may be faint as the stirring of a soft breeze through the trees or as loud as a brass band in a parade. Or you may not hear a sound at all, but feel an urging, an inner pull, a sense of excitement and longing that resonates from within. This is the call to create, and it is universal, bidding each of us to bring something new into being.

“Creativity is the Self searching for itself,” said George Gamez, Ph.D., author of How to Catch Lightning in a Bottle. We create in order to express our unique visions and perceptions. We create to communicate and to form a bond with our fellow human beings. Creative expression helps us feel connected to the world and builds bridges of understanding. It nourishes us and helps us grow, provides insights and deeper understandings. Creativity is fun, exciting and playful. It relieves stress and releases tension. It provides a way of communication when normal channels may be blocked or are insufficient—when we must speak in colors and textures and shimmering visions and music.

Creativity is love expressing itself; it heals and renews. Our creations are mirrors in which others may see themselves and the signature of our lives that says, “This is how I saw it.”

Everyone is Creative

No matter what you may have been told, every one of us is creative. It is as much a part of us as our voice and breath and fingerprints. Creativity isn’t just about making “art.” Cooking, gardening, handiwork and crafts, keeping a journal are all creative acts. Arranging flowers or rearranging furniture, painting a picture or painting a room, singing on stage or singing in the shower—these are responses to the call.

Creativity is a way of living. It is being spontaneous and playful, exercising the imagination, finding solutions, and embracing possibilities and doing it all with passion.

Yet for all the joy and fulfillment it brings, some resist the call to be creative. In our culture the ideas that “Time is money” and “Art is frivolous” are common, and old messages such as, “Stay inside the lines” or “You can do better than that” have remarkable staying power. It takes courage to look beneath the surface of what we’ve been told in order to find our heart’s desire.

Creativity requires risk-taking. It asks us to surrender, to let go and to trust. “Committing to our creativity is an act of faith,” wrote Jan Phillips, in Marry Your Muse. “A promise to believe in ourselves.”

Honoring the creative Self means finding time, making space, being patient and taking the chance of looking foolish. You cannot care too much what others think or say. You must be willing to start over and stay with it; creativity takes stamina. There are no magical secrets or absolute rules. Creativity can’t be taught. You just do it.

Like the body’s natural urge for motion and the human need for connection and community, the spirit longs to express itself. So when you hear the call to create, answer, “Yes.” It is your self searching for your Self, a movement toward being whole.

Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire Communications

Listening to Our Bodies: They Know More than We Do!

listen-to-your-bodyThe body holds much of the information we need to function at our best, but too often we ignore its messages and plow ahead with what our minds tell us.
Perhaps because we’re not taught from early on to pay attention to internal messages as well as external demands, we frequently ignore our body’s communications.
So we take another extra-strength aspirin rather than investigating what’s causing our head to ache. We use more caffeine or sugar to give us a lift when we feel tired, rather than hearing our body’s message about needing rest or recognizing our fatigue as an early symptom of burnout we’d do well to heed. A look at our pets may be all the message we need about the value of naps.
We fail to take into account the thousand little messages communicated to us by how we’re holding ourselves: the mouth that’s pinched and tight rather than relaxed. The fact that our shoulders are up around our ears, the knot of tension in our stomach as we promise to do something when closer consideration might tell us we are already over-extended.
These days we’re notorious for putting deadlines ahead of the protests of aching bones or inadequately nourished bellies. (Is there hidden wisdom in calling a due date a deadline in the first place?) Instead of asking our body what it wants, we go for the quick fill-up or the comfort food that may be the last thing we really need.
So what to do to give your body an equal say in how you use it?
Start with the breath. Breathing consciously is a major part of body awareness. Turn off thoughts and just let yourself experience the inflow and outflow of breath. Label them, “In. Out. In. Out.” Note how and where you are breathing or failing to, a clear sign something important is going on.
Allow yourself quiet time. Sit for ten minutes just observing yourself, even (especially!) in the middle of a busy day. Meditate. Take a walk or a nap. Allow time to do nothing. Soak in a hot tub rather than taking a quick shower.
Get a massage. It’s not self-indulgence to be massaged; it wakes up the whole nervous system and helps you tune in.
Use your journal to dialogue with your body. Ask your body how it’s feeling, what it wants, what’s going on. Give that sore wrist or stiff lower back a voice and let it tell you what its message is.
Eat when hungry, sleep when tired. Take a week and really pay attention to your body’s most basic needs. Do your real rhythms for eating and sleeping conform to the habits you’ve established? If they don’t, change them!
Do a body inventory to relax. Start with your toes and work upwards. Scan your body from the inside. Or try tensing each part slightly, then relaxing it to release residual tension.
Practice mindfulness. Get used to tuning in to your physical self, wherever you are, whatever you’re doing.
If your body suggests rolling down a grassy hillside, taking flight on a playground swing, or skipping down a winding path – why resist? Its impulses hold the key to our well-being!
Practice these steps for a few days/weeks and share with us your experiences below. Or if you already follow these guidelines, what are some tips you have for others?
And, if you think you can’t seem to get over the “mental hump” that is keeping you from listening to your body, please join me in August for my next Group Call on Healthy Body!

Listening Tips and Traps: How do you rate?

big earsHave you ever noticed how GOOD it feels to be really listened to? It’s impactful, particularly when the listening goes beyond just the words you’re speaking. That kind of artful listening conveys respect and value to the speaker, and promotes positive relationships of all kinds.

And, like any art, it takes practice.

According to widely referenced statistics by Dr. Albert Mehrabian, known for his pioneering work in nonverbal communication, only 7% of communication happens through a person’s actual words (38% through tone and 55% through body language). That’s why it’s important to hone our skills to listen at deeper levels.

A good place to start is by understanding the three listening levels described in the book Co-Active Coaching, by Laura Whitworth, Henry Kimsey-House and Phil Sandahl.

Listening Levels
Level 1Internal: We hear the other person’s words, but our focus is on what it means to us—our thoughts, feelings, judgments and conclusions. We may also be concerned with what the other person thinks of us. This level is useful for checking in with our feelings or to make decisions.

Level 2Laser-Focused: Our attention is focused like a laser beam on the other person, with little awareness of anything else. With such strong focus, we are curious, open and have little time to pay attention to our own feelings or worry about how we are being received. Mind chatter disappears with such a sharp focus.

Level 3Global: Our attention is spread out like an antenna with a 360-degree range. It allows us to pick up emotions, energy, body language and the environment itself. Intuition heightens as we tune into the deeper layers of what is going on around us.

All three levels are necessary. However, when we spend too much time in self-focused Level 1 listening, our communication can seriously suffer. Engaging all three levels at once, with more emphasis on Levels 2 and 3, can improve how we listen—and the impact of how we are received.

Listening Blocks
Having spent more than 20 years training business people in listening skills, Richard Anstruther and his team of communication experts at HighGain, Inc., have identified five main listening blocks:

Tune Out—Listeners are not paying attention to the speaker due to disinterest in the speaker or subject, thinking about other things or multitasking.

Detach—Listeners are emotionally detached from the speaker, concerned with content only, not the feelings behind it. They may be only half listening, not really interacting, and miss the message’s underlying meaning.

Rehearse—Listeners are concentrating on what to say or do next, rather than focusing on the speaker’s message.

Judge—Listeners have a different opinion that causes them to block out new ideas and information or lose track of the conversation. They analyze and interpret the speaker’s delivery or message, missing the point. They criticize, give advice and make assumptions.
 
Control—Listeners don’t allow the speaker to talk at his or her own pace. They constantly interrupt with comments or questions, and don’t allow the speaker to finish a point.

Try This!
Below are a few suggestions for honing your listening skills. Enjoy!

1. Experiment with Levels 1, 2 and 3 listening, one at a time, to fully understand the dynamics at each level. Try this in everyday conversation, or practice with someone. Take turns telling a story and listening. The results may surprise you!

2. Spend some time noticing how often you fall into tuning out, detaching, rehearsing, judging or controlling. What can you do to keep from falling into these common traps?

3. In your everyday conversations, or in an intentional practice session with a partner, explore each listening block, one at a time. Notice how you feel and the impact on the person with whom you are communicating.

The first step to developing artful listening is to choose to truly listen. As you continue to develop your listening skills, your communications and your relationships are likely to become increasingly satisfying and rich!

Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire Communications
 

Procrastination—Everyone Talks About It, but Nobody Does Anything

procrastinationImagine the space this article fills as blank.
Imagine the time and energy it might have taken someone who procrastinates to: 1) think about doing the article, 2) put it on a list of “to dos,” 3) talk about doing it, 4) promise himself he will start it tomorrow, 5) promise himself he will definitely start it tomorrow, 6) promise…well, you get the point.
As the deadline for the article draws near (it’s midnight the night before the article is due), imagine the stress the writer must feel as he brews a pot of coffee and sets himself up for a couple of hours to research the topic, organize the information, create an outline, come up with a dynamite opening line, write the article, rewrite the article, rewrite it again, print it out and rewrite it one more time. And, of course, the whole time he’s beating himself up for waiting so long to start and telling himself he’s no good at this job anyway and the article will be a bust.
This is procrastination in full, weedy flower. Delay. Broken promises and unfulfilled expectations. Feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem. Worry. Fear. Stress. Overwork and probably not as good an end product as the writer would have produced if he’d tackled the job in a timely, reasonable, professional manner.
Procrastination isn’t good for anyone, anytime. So why do so many do it? Not just around such matters as filing income tax and completing holiday shopping, but with everyday tasks such as cleaning off the desk or straightening up the garage or starting a project at work.
The more difficult, inconvenient or scary the task is perceived to be, the more procrastinators procrastinate. They come up with semi-convincing self-talk that makes the delay appear reasonable, but in the end it’s a self-defeating behavior that causes all sorts of problems, not the least of which is stress.
Following are a few remedies to overcome procrastination:
 
1. Set goals. Decide what you want and what needs to happen to get it. Be specific. Create a realistic timetable.
 
2. Commit. Make a contract with yourself. Tell a friend or co-worker or family member your plan. Ask for help when you need it.
 
3. Set priorities. Make a list of things that need to be done in order of their importance.
 
4. Get organized. Have the right tools and equipment to do the job. Make lists. Keep a schedule.
 
5. Think small. Don’t let the whole of the project overwhelm you. Stay in the present and do what you are doing.
 
6. Break tasks into parts. The “Swiss cheese” approach to getting any major project completed is to break it apart and work on one piece at a time. Reward yourself when you complete one step.
 
7. Use positive self-talk.
 
8. Replace excuses with rational, realistic thinking.
 
9. Realize there is no such thing as perfection. Begin the thing knowing it can never be done perfectly. You’ll do your best. You always do.
 
10. Reward yourself. Often and generously for accomplishing the smallest of tasks. Celebrate. Pat yourself on the back. Enjoy your accomplishment.
Like many other self-defeating behaviors, procrastination can be overcome. The place to begin is where you are.
The time to start is now.
Author’s content used  under license, © 2008 Claire Communications